Claim Your Own Mental Fitness

Too Clever to Care

You can be too special to thrive, if the eleventh toxic belief quietly liberates your Child. You can be too clever to care, if the twelfth belief incites your Child to action. Belief # 12, that if you’re more clever than most people, it’s okay to find shortcuts around the frustrating rules in our society, can lead you to act without conscience. The rules of our communities are carefully developed to protect the rights and safety of all members. When you realize you’ve chosen not to follow one of these rules, your Adult should rein in your Child’s self-focused behavior, […]

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Too Special to Thrive

“Entitled generation: owed certain rights and benefits without further justification” Dictionary .com The definition above refers to the group of people born between 1979 and 1994. For us pre-baby-boomers, the word “spoiled” comes to mind. And for critics of Mr.(Fred) Rogers’ soothing programs for young kids, the key word is “special.” These terms are all used to describe people who are just too special to thrive, leaving the rest of us to take care of them indefinitely. In mental fitness terms, their Indulgent Parent allows their Child too much freedom. As noted in the previous blog on the ninth toxic […]

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25 Put Your Mental Fitness House in Order

25 Put Your Mental Fitness House in Order

Sorting out your house for spring? Here’s how to put your mental fitness house in order. No fancy brain labels, just a scaffold to hang things on for ready access. This scaffold provides an overly brief description, but one that is easy to review and build upon. Referring to the previous blog, you could say that this scaffold forms the lantern for your candle. Let’s take each part from the top down. Whole Brain: includes everything above “Interpersonal Relating.” Child: activities listed below calm your child, drawing it out of fight-or-flight. Arrows denote how input from your Adult and Parent […]

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24 A Lantern for Your Candle

24 A Lantern for Your Candle

“When you see what’s wrong and you try to make it right, you will be a point of light.” Randy Travis This line from Randy Travis always brings me to tears. But wishing don’t make it so. First you must construct a lantern for your candle. This spark of inspiration and faith in yourself, like all fire, needs containment and guidance to become Travis’ point of light. Mrs. Fixit would say that the candle represents the unique set of skills and talents you have to fuel this light and your Adult must experiment with how to keep it lit. The […]

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9-s Reflect, Revise and Renew

9-s Reflect, Revise and Renew

Fake Fir (12/04) Always the scent of pine pitch In the chill night air, crushed out Of the carpet of needles lavishly strewn Over the corner tree lot. Always the hunt for the quintessential Tree-of-the year, just so tall, Just so irregular, just so fluffy. Often in the rain, always in the dark. Rebellion crept in slowly over the years, First, with fewer gifts mailed out, Then no more German Honey Bars, And last, the ultimate sacrilege. There it was on sale at McLendon’s: Frankly artificial and just the right size. Up a week earlier and not so prickly, With […]

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22 Be Assertive to Be Mentally Fit

22 Be Assertive to Be Mentally Fit

This picture shows that somebody wanted to create a unique statement at the beach. He or she thought about what to sculpt and carefully formed this octopus of damp sand. To make it more visible, the sculptor laid out seaweed to contrast with its arms. Now we can readily see this remarkable design. Social skills like assertiveness require this kind of focus, caring and creative problem-solving. You just can’t fill a bucket with sand and dump it out. Your Adult needs to set goals, study what they’ll require and then work with your Child and Parent parts to develop and […]

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